With considerable input from the student voice, the paper centres on a detailed account of the experiences of Western academic, tutoring Eastern students online to develop their critical thinking skills. From their online experiences together as tutor and students, the writers present a considered case for the main emphasis in facilitative online tutoring to be on building, and then building upon, congruent relationships and constructive feedforward. Initially, the Western tutor had followed as best he could the norms of a Confucian Heritage Culture, concentrating reactively on instructional feedback. He then took the considered risk of reverting to proactivity, following the advice of Rogers and Vygotsky and according to an explicit rationale. The ensuing changes in students' online discussions and their learning experiences were marked and were objectively analysed. The tutor and two of his students suggest that the nature of congruent tutor/student relationships, irrespective of culture, is more significant in effectively promoting development than the cognitive content that might feature in feedback in such interactions. For it seems possible from the reported experiences that learning dependent on technological links may benefit from meaningful tutor/student relationships. A video abstract of this article can be viewed at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=teslTzgVBsc&feature=youtu.be