This article examines the various elements affecting reconciliation and coexistence in deeply divided societies through the case of Arab soccer players in the Israeli media. We analyze the discourse surrounding the concept du‐kium (coexistence) in the Israeli media between the years 2002 and 2008. Our findings reveal that Jewish journalists and public figures interpret coexistence as Arab citizens' complete acceptance of the Jewish perspective and narrative. Arab soccer players are expected to underplay their Palestinian identity, master Hebrew, and identify with the Jewish narrative and views. We contrast the Israeli case with two other cases of prolonged conflict—Rwanda and Bosnia‐Herzegovina. The study highlights that cognitive perceptions and schemes may hinder genuine reconciliation even when various groups reject overt racism and profess candid desire for coexistence.